Tagged: Letting Go

Apr 22

An hour of exercise a day and an healthy diet keep you skinny…

That’s what the commercial said.

I didn’t actually hear it. The Boy was listening to the TV with his headphones on.

“It said ‘an hour of exercise a day and a balanced diet can keep you skinny and healthy,’” he said removing the headphones and looking at the TV quizzically.

“You sure they didn’t say ‘keep you slim?’” I asked.

“Nope, it said ‘keep you skinny.’ That’s weird.”

And then he did a mini rant about exercising but not just to do it for 60 minutes, but because he’s always outside playing.

I just let the smile growing across my face (how can I not be a proud mama when my kid says something so innocently insightful?) and nodded my approval of his assessment.

But I’m still bothered by the fact that the healthy diet and exercise PSA was selling skinny, rather than health and fun in the sun. Which brings me to the deep feeling of sadness I have when I look around safe neighborhoods and see not a single kid outside playing. And yet, there are commercials telling kids they can be skinny if they exercise for an hour a day.

As the Boy so aptly pointed out, kids could spend the entire day exercising, if they were outside running around, playing.

While society is realizing that our collective health is deteriorating, instead of encouraging kids to go outside and play (and encouraging parents to let them), the TV (a serious play-killer) tells them that if they want to be skinny, they should get an hour of exercise.

There’s a serious disconnect here. So in keeping with the brave free-range steps recommended in Lenore Skenazy’s Free-Range Kids book (which I’ll post an official review of once I’ve finished reading), I gave the boy an index card to show people when and if they ask what he’s doing out there without an adult, and let him go to the big park near our house. Yes, the same park, less than a mile away, from which he was returning, when I was summoned by the police because he went into a fast food joint asking for water. The same park where he made his first friends in the neighborhood; friends he hasn’t been able to see since the incident.

Naturally, I’m nervous considering what happened last time. But we went over the rules, the Boy asked what time he should come home, gave me a hug and went off to enjoy his chance to play. Instead of giving in to the fear, I can rest assured that my kid will be out running around, instead of sitting in the house playing video games, watching TV and being sold 60 minutes of skinny.

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Feb 28

On goals, desire and the timing of it all

So I’ve been going back and forth for the last month or so about the grad school thing. The plan was to apply to this great program where I’d get two masters degrees: one from the London School of Economics and another from USC. Whether or not I would get in was never a question; I assumed that applying meant acceptance because I’m just that awesome.

The problem was in trying to figure out how I would get to London, pay tuition, support myself as a student in another country and then in 10 months turn around an come back to the states and basically start all over. The fact is that while the program would change my life and fits into my aspiration to one day be a college professor, I can’t really afford it.

Now sure I could take out a huge loan or try for a grant or two, but I want to get out of debt, not deeper into debt. So I decided that it was time to rethink this goal and whether or not this is the right time to pursue it. And I’ve come to the conclusion that the answer is a resounding no.

Right now is the time to focus on getting my freelance writing business going, paying down my debt and becoming more financially secure. I may have a job but I still live check to check and there is always at least one bill that goes unpaid every month. And that’s just not ok with me.

So my focus has shifted. Well, really, its become more clear. Its great to push yourself to the limit but I think I was trying to do too much. And truthfully, I feel much better having let go of one thing in order to focus on something that for me in far more important right now.

Have you ever had to let go of something you really wanted because the timing wasn’t right?

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